Run Away With Me

Sometimes, to make extra money, or any money at all, I go on commercial auditions. Sometimes I even book them. (Rarely, but sometimes.) The ones I usually book or at least get call-backs for are normally running-related. This is because I ran cross-country and track in college and I still run a lot. This is also because all of the other girls at the auditions typically come dressed in yoga pants and slinky little tank tops, an outfit befitting to say, painting your toenails, but certainly not going for a run. Anyone who has ever run (competitively, or just somewhat seriously) knows if the wardrobe calls for "running attire" this leaves you with a few very specific options: those very short shorts with the built-in underwear, short spandex (or long ones if it's cold), a sports bra or one of those longer sports bra shirts, a t-shirt or tank top works too, and of course running shoes (shockingly some of these model girls even forget those sometimes).

Anyway, the other day I had an audition for an online running ad. The audition request read:

Description: EXPERIENCED runner, physically toned and fit, 25-40. No on-camera lines, but voiceover dialogue will be recorded at the shoot. Please wear running attire for audition. If cast, you will need to provide two sets of running attire for the shoot. Auditioners will be asked to demonstrate running ability.

This is for a 30-second commercial to be distributed through Google TV.

This is a non-union project.

Yet the above failed to mention that it was actually a commercial for a runners online dating service (“You know, runners trying to meet and date other runners”). During the audition I had to read a script that said something like, "With my busy schedule it's just so hard to meet people. I wish I could find someone who shares the same passion I do for running and the outdoors." And I had to say that while jogging in place.

You just can't make this stuff up.